summary

i’ve hurt my leg on monday and i’m to be stayed at home for 2 weeks at least.
my mother when being told about my situation replied that it would be a “great time for thinking and acknowledgement”
i cracked laughing out loud – couldn’t help it really.

but i must tell – she was fuckin’ right.

been trying to put a finger on the source of my uneasiness since yesterday and this is what i have:

the truth is i’m afraid of depending on other people and being let down by them.
so i had severed all connections of any kind i’d had in last years.

i’m positively surprised that there IS one person to do a bit of shopping for me in a nearby shop, but i still unmistakably hate my dependence on him in this matter.


мысль что в случае чего мой труп найдут примерно через месяц
не довлеет над моим сознанием, но постоянно обретается где-то на бекграунде.
from twitter; 14:02, Mar 10th from web

scars

Для исцеления очень важно некоторое время упорно размышлять над травмой, чтобы уяснить ее причину. Но в конце концов на каждую рану нужно наложить шов и предоставить ей возможность зажить, образуя шрам.